PCP: Maiden Voyage

One of the things I got to do in PCP today was...a DRE (digital rectal exam). I didn't really remember which way to turn the finger so I told Dr. P he had to show me what to do. Wrong thing to say: the patient groaned, "Uh oh." Dr. P joked, "It's her maiden voyage." Fortunately my finger was a lot smaller than Dr. P's (and he'd already done the first DRE), so I didn't make the patient suffer too much. He even joked that men should see how large a doctor's fingers are when choosing a doctor (less discomfort, hehe) and offered to let me try a second time. Uhh...no thanks. But if a single finger can hurt so much...man, how do gay couples handle it?

One of the opioid addicts from yesterday came back after one day on Suboxone, and he had improved noticeably. I even noticed a little spring in his step when he was walking, whereas yesterday he was dragging his feet. The last patients of the day was this elderly couple, the husband had mild dementia, and the wife had Parkinsons'. Their daughter was with them and had all these forms for Dr. P to sign and lists of medications for him to write for her parents. She obviously loved her parents but her demeanor came off as brash and bossy. Dr. P winked at me a few times in the middle of her tirades and later asked if I've officially been turned off to primary care, but the answer is no. Difficult parents and children are part of the package in medicine, and besides, it's nice that the couple has a daughter who cares. The husband was pretty funny; he kept asking if he needed to take Lipitor (but he's on Zocor), and the daughter kept saying, "No, Dad, you're on Zocor, not Lipitor!" But he'd forget and ask again 5 min later. *sigh* Dementia is a sad disease.